I spent a lifetime
Once, trying to love you right
Didn't work, sorry
SunrisesI want to fall asleep with you
and run my hand up and down your spine
counting the ridges as I go
I want to feel your breath on mine
from shallow to deep with aching sleep
and barely brushing my eyelashes
I want to place my hand on your hip
and run my thumb over it, softly
just to watch your eyes flutter
I want to push your hair out of my face
when you turn and nudge into my neck
and your nose presses to my cheek
I want to fall in love with you
as the sun rises early morning
and casts an orange glow around the room
UntitledI am the wind howling in the eaves
pacing the trails of your dragging knees
I watch as you mourn, gaze as
your darkened eyes hollow out
little by little, day by day
You do not see me and I, not you
I gather the clues you leave behind
I piece them together in my mind
with the string unraveled from your guise
But when I find you, when I see you
I do not expect your forlorn figure, lined
in moonlight, crumpled between
I acknowledge you will have faded
your drawling footsteps will have ended there
And I may whistle around the spot you have been
but I will not see you; you have not lived
So close and
I'm so very different than you
I cannot win you dearly pallid
Ivory sullen and ghastly
Face sunken in your love in me
Your cheekbones are visibly silver
I only wish
I could lose you
My transparency child
BlackYour fingers drape on porcelain skin
They blind me in the blacklight
Ebony and pale and all inbetween
Who could love another but you?
For you are the one of the eclipse
UV rays on sunlit days
The satellite to my star
And D, all of the above
I only wish
I could hold you
A Cliche Killjoy FanFic Chapter 2ZERO HERO'S P.O.V.
Done and done, I thought as I strolled out of the back door to the BL/ind hospital, pushing a cart of oxygen tanks in front of me. I was a drac, nobody cared. I grinned under my drac mask as I loaded the oxygen tanks, one by one, into the back of the car. Thirty tanks were loaded, and Neg and I were ready to go. I pushed the cart away from me, and climbed in the front seat.
It took my a second to realize there was no Negative Grenade. "Negative?!" I called frantically, twisting around in my seat. "Neegaative?" There was no answer, of course, just an eerie silence and an empty space where Negative should have been. "Negative, don't kid!" Stumbling out of my car, I saw there was a troupe of draculoids heading towards me. By now I had taken off my mask. There was nowhere to hide.
Instead, I jumped back in the car and pressed. It sped forward; this was my only desperate attempt to get away. The bulle
A Cliche Killjoy FanFic Chapter 1ZERO HERO'S P.O.V.
It's almost been a year out here in the desert. A year since I pulled the IV line out of Negative Grenade and wheeled his gurney out of the hospital, boxes and boxes of medication beside him. A year since the second trip back to retrieve the carts of oxygen tanks needed for Neg's survival. Two years since Neg himself was diagnosed with lung cancer - the specific name unknown.
Neg and I haven't even met the Fabulous Killjoys yet. At least, not the main four. We've definitely met several out here in the zones, people like House Rules and Atomic Nucleus(she really liked science, by the way). Mostly I've been keeping myself away from them, though, hiding myself and Negative Grenade in an abandoned shed along the road. We meet the 'Joys to stock up on food and catch up on news around the zones. But still, most of our information comes from Dr. Death Defying's radio station.
Today was oxygen day
Ice cream, pavement
Melting dreams down the grille
Blue eyes crying, a hug from Mom
But still leaving a sense of loss
No kind words can comfort
Nor ease the pain
Being Pro-Life isn't easy."Prolifers’ are crazy fascists
Who complain about abortion,
They put some cells before a life,
And chastise a woman for her choices.
They must not understand,
How it feels to be judged,
To be hated or shunned down upon.
Or deprived of love."
But get this straight right now,
Because that’s not at all true
I have a really good feeling,
You don’t know what we go through.
Pro- life isn’t about abortion,
Whether a fetus is alive or not,
It has a much more deeper meaning,
And it would help to give it some thought.
Pro-life fights for those,
Who are alone, depressed or scared
Who think death is the only way,
To get them anywhere.
Prolife fights for those,
Who are beaten, for their orientation
or those who are looked down by the nation.
Pro life fights for those,
Who starve in other countries,
Why do you think Catholic Groups,
Go to feed the poor and hungry?
Prolife fights for those,
Who simply have nothing left,
Who are alone in the world,
And are welcomed by onl
StargazingThe stars are watching me tonight
as I am gazing at them too,
and imagine what it feels right
beside the one I love; It's you.
I picture you as one of them,
illuminating from afar.
I'll gaze at you, like precious gem,
and dream that we will be at par.
Little messagesJust when another lonely day, starts to bring me down,
I could be out shopping or just strolling around.
I think of you of course, as I always do.
My dearest love, I´m still missing you.
My sadness, it begins to show,
it is no use, the tears just flow.
Then your spirit seems to talk to me,
cos everywhere there´s a message I see.
Messages on book covers, tell me" I should trust in me".
even on some bath salts, says "don´t worry be happy".
"Keep your chin up", "let your angel always be your guide".
It´s then I know you´re still there for me, always by my side.
The tears still flow, they always will
but now I know you are with me still.
It brings me comfort, it picks me up.
I know for sure, I´ll always have your love.
Poetry by Suzanne karbach November 2014
And Everything Was BlueAnd everything was blue
but nothing was sad
How was I supposed to know
it would (almost) be you?
It was just my mind
I just liked your jeans
and your eyes
And then you walked
through the doors
taller than before
It was just my heart
And I just liked your eyes
and your smile
Then I learned your ways:
one hand on your hip, one knee bent
the face of a tired man
and the veins of a kid
There's a roar behind
your tightrope lips
That can disarm, strengthen
a silence, a shyness
a jazz 'n' blues aorta
the definites before
"...kinda", "...maybe", "...sorta"
It was just my head and heart
not knowing what to do
I just loved
being near you
It started with a flash
of teeth to
a tease, a salute,
then everything was blue
Is it odd that I guessed my fate before I could even piece it together?
With my father and his cruel teachings.
My mother and her superiority.
My brother and his anger.
My sister and her detachment.
I've been smiling this whole time..
This whole time!
But that's all I ever did.
Not breathing, not catching a breath.
But now, I understand why I didn't.
For each time I breathed, I breathed glass.
Sharp pointed shards.
Piercing my throat, cutting my tongue, blood gushing from every slash.
Thick crimson lava dripping down to my adam's apple.
Blood flying out with each cough.
Oh-how this pain defines me!
Oh-how I wish it didn't.
I Failed YouSo many ways
This could have gone
With a fake dawn
Is this our fate?
Is it too late?
To cut the tether
I've failed you
I wish I could atone
For what I put you through
But I’m already alone
Never Let goA few words is all I need
I swore the knife wouldn't make me bleed
But I fear the time has come at last
For me to return to the past
The one place I cannot survive
At least then I wasn't alive
The last place I want to be
All I want is you with me
I want nothing but your smiling face
The one thing I desire is your embrace
Is there any way to let me know
I swear I won’t let you go
I know.I see those moments that we were happy.
Forever encaptured by that oaken framed glass.
Those memories shall forever be locked away in my golden vault.
But I think the issue is that we won't have them anymore.
Our tea scented home would never be crowded with our aroma.
Our burning fireplace won't be relit.
Those chairs outside would never again be used.
We both have a different road.
One that has million of paths, and thousands of passages.
But something is odd.
Even though I know this..
I still hope and crave for a day where I can hold onto you.
I mourn and lament for that one moment where our hands would brush..
But our lives are different.
And I am letting go.